'Ariel if she brings her father's trident': Disney princesses ranked by their Mortal Kombat capabilities

Jesse Kessenheimer • Writer and Editor

Mar 15, 2024 1:00 PM EDT

Creating hypothetical situations is the pride and joy of every nerd. If Frodo traveled to Mordor with Beetlejuice, how could that change the story of Lord of the Rings? If Hermione fell in love with Draco Malfoy instead of Ron, would she become a Slytherin? And if the Disney princesses were all thrown into the universe of Mortal Kombat, who would win?

Now, I know it's no secret that a lot of the Disney gals were damsels in distress. With a lot of the classics being made before women were considered assets in combat, a lot of the Disney princesses we imagine feel fragile, whimsical, and certainly not prepared for a finishing move. However, there are some tough ol' birds out there in the Disney world–especially of late.

Who would you choose as you fighter if it came down to the Disney princesses? Elsa is essentially a demi-god that controls ice and forms of life. Mulan is a hardened warrior and destroyer of rogue nations. And Pocahontas was likely no stranger to brutality. You be the judge on which of these 'damsels' that could win a flawless victory over Johnny Cage in hand-to-hand kombat.

Fatality!